My meditation practice stretches over several years. My first inclination towards meditation occurred when I first practiced yoga—circa 1995—when it was prescribed to me by a western neurosurgeon to avoid back surgery. For me, yoga was a stretching, balancing and strength exercise that had a period or two of relaxation/meditation techniques, generally at the beginning and end of the “exercise” segment. For years this was the framework for my meditative practice, while not a daily practice, I regularly did yoga two to three times per week. With the benefit of hindsight, I can point to improvements not only in my physical well-being but also my mental awareness and strength. I am certain I was happier, more at peace and receptive to the universe.
While living in Asia (2004-2008) my inclination towards meditation took a big leap forward. Living near (as in, directly adjacent) to Buddhist temples I developed a keen interest in Buddhism and their much stronger inclination to daily meditative practice. During our time in Asia I became a “Barnes and Noble Buddhist,” reading and studying every text I could find but never taking the step to deepen my practice by attending temple. Nevertheless, my awareness and resultant practice of setting time for daily meditation was put into play – almost exclusively with a Buddha-centered teaching at its core. Regardless of the form of the intention, I found such a peaceful feeling of gratitude and acceptance while in Asia and I attributed this to my developing a meditation practice.
Fast forward to February 2010 when I began my UNITY/UCOH journey. Whether it was Keys to the Kingdom, the Path Class or my SEE classwork, Meditation and contemplation became a central part of my spiritual unfoldment. It was music to my ears, Mind and Heart!!!!! Meditation, Faith, God, Love, Forgiveness, Gratitude (and on and on) were finally tied together in my consciousness. Finally, this is the place where I always knew I needed to be.
Fast forward to 2014 when meditation became an assignment as part of my SEE Week homework. In my mind, a month of meditation and journaling would be a breeze. After all, I already “had this down pat.” As I started, my intention was strong, I was focused and I was able to able to enter my meditation with less chatter/monkey-mind stuff. SEE had been such a wonderful experience so I attributed this “improvement” to coming off such a great week. I felt so connected. Every morning, I would retreat to my quiet spot, turn on my “meditation music,” light a stick of incense and enter my Secret Place for 20-30 minutes. All was well with my little meditation ritual.
This remained the case for me until one day, when reading Ernest Holmes’ “The Sermon on the Mount” I was confronted with a new, perhaps challenging idea. The theme of the point being made was one of my favorites, “appreciate everything but attach to nothing,” which is another way of saying, be in the present. Specifically, Mr. Holmes was making the point that ritualistic behavior can have its downside, even if well-intentioned. The point was, attaching to a ritual can limit one’s openness to the continuing Divine unfoldment within and around us. “Right” ritual in its beginning form is mostly helpful (it’s the formation of a “right” habit), but his warning was to be careful to not let the habit become habitual in its physical appearances. Wow, was my daily meditation practice becoming too habitual? Was I becoming too attached to the “physical” space that I needed to create? Was I too attached to past outcomes of my practice? I knew that Divine Order and Divine Plan had led me to this passage and I knew I was meant to explore it.
So, after a day or two of reflection, including my “day of meditation/reflection,” I began an experiment to gently deconstruct my meditation ritual, trying to be careful not to totally abandon its inherent goodness. My main effort was to not rely on a single meditation event each day, rather to let the beauty I would see throughout the day take me to my secret place by becoming centered and quiet and connecting with Spirit. I’m not sure whether these moments of connection with Spirit are meditation or prayer, but I’m confident it doesn’t really matter. My Connections are now strung out during the day which helps me keep a consciousness even when “not Connected.” I like this a lot. I don’t try to plan it or “set the stage” in any way. I just let it happen whenever and wherever it enters my consciousness. I still start my day with a period of reflection – getting off on the “right” foot with the “right” intention but I’ve let my life become a meditation and it’s a freeing experience.
